Sunday, 21 August 2011
That all changed a few weeks ago, it started with me getting increasingly grumpy with everyone and realising that i had neglected "me" time over the last few months, our meditation/quiet shed had been changed into an office which on one hand is great as it gives me a seperation between work and family time but i am missing it as a meditation place. I realised it had been weeks since i had listened to the soul touching music of my two favourite groups Il Divo and Blake. We took a day out of the usual routine and went for a lunchtime meal at a place i used to work many years ago and where Gary and I used to go when we were first going out , of course it had changed but it still held memories and we realised we hadn't done anything like that since Ryan was born 20 years ago!!!!!
That was also the day Garys Gran died, it was painful as although she lived locally she had chosen to cut us out of her life 26 years ago mainly we believe because she had lost a son to a motorcycle accident when he was just 24 and didn't want want to get hurt again by getting close to anyone but as fate seems to do in the month or so before she died Gary happened to visit his mum at the same time she was there and a peace seemed to be found, she said she had been selfish and on the last visit to the hospital Gary made it clear it was 26 wasted years but that it was ok and that he loved her and she should remember that. She died about an hour later.
Since then it has been an emotional rollercoaster with situations seeming to conspire to make us face any unresolved situations and issues and hangups that we have that are holding us back. Three months of development seems to have been thrown at us in one go - perhaps theres a lesson in there somewhere. We are gradually facing and resolving these things one at a time and with each one it feels like we have blown up another boulder that has been stopping us moving forward on our path. Its surprising how facing and challenging situations can open up the next part of the journey. We are after all here to learn and it amazes me how many people choose the easiest path of least resistance in their lives and then wonder why they don't progress or they continue getting the same old problems come up. We were like that for many years and now having experienced the other side of the coin we welcome challenges as we know we will be stronger and progress if we face them head on.
Facing them can be very emotional and uncomfortable and in some cases very painful but that is shortlived compared to ignoring them because they will come around again at some point and will seem bigger and in some cases become monsters which we have to face. Believe me, we have been there, done that and i know now what i prefer.
We are feeling drained because of the intensity of the emotions and it has been incredibly painful at times but we will gather our strength again over the coming days and deal with some issues which need to be addressed in the near future and i know that will make us even stronger and propel us and our Business to the next level and we welcome that.